A Penny For My Thoughts

Your Support Is My Strength

By Paul Wein

Everyone who knows me or reads my columns knows that today is a very sad and stressful day for me. Between watching the ceremony, recalling my 90 days working at Ground Zero – and remembering my fallen friend – this day each year is without a doubt the hardest of them all. But while my emotions and feelings run deeper than the deepest hole – there is a chain of support that always pulls me out – and this column is dedicated to them all.

All day long, from phone calls, to e-mails, to text messages, to voice mails, to MySpace and Facebook posts – so many people have contacted me to see if I was okay and share their memories of Doug – including people I hardly speak to or haven’t spoken to in years. It got to the point where my Blackberry battery, which was fully charged – went dead – because that is how many people reached out to me.

From my extremely supportive wife Julie; to ex-girlfriends who are still my dear friends like Sandy, Wendi and Mary; to good friends like Lisa Schmerz, Karen and Brain; to co-workers who are good friends like Avery, Desiree and Trina; to people I hardly speak to like Steph, Lynn and Ginni – and to so many others that took the time to make the time to say that they were thinking of me and Doug was truly a bright spot in this very dark cloud. There are so many others that I forgot to mention, but to everyone who paused to remember Doug and my sadness – I can’t thank you enough.

While I appreciate all the people I know who have called me, I received an e-mail this afternoon that absolutely changed the dynamic of this day. It was from a woman named Camille Bright-Smith, who is part of the 2,996 Project, which creates tributes to all the victims of that tragic day. Camille’s was a song called, “Alive In Me” – which is dedicated to his life using information from past columns I have written about Doug. An e-mail from her today came out of left field – and truly made my day. The lyrics to her beautifully written and amazing song and the song itself can be found "here". I spoke to her and through tears – thanked her profusely for creating the tribute to my best friend that she did. She is truly an Angel.

If I missed anyone, I am sorry, but to all who remembered Doug on this day, as well as my plight – thank you so very much.

Doug thanks you too.

“Well its been a few rough years since you found your way to Heaven.
We miss your mug down here you crazy handsome devil.
And Amy’s doin’ all right.
She’s a good one that’s for sure.
Everybody always laughs when they think of you.
You know you left us wanting more.
We always think of the days when the Yankees ruled the world.
You called it like you saw it man, then you found that pretty girl.
You straightened up man.
You were flyin’ right.
Headed for the American dream, with that crazy sexy wife.
Remember goofin’ at the toy store like a couple of crazy kids?
Remember Sgt. Slaughter?
Yeah, you can gloat a little bit.
You were smarter than the rest of us.
The funny man, the teaser.
Said you were sick of it all, but you wore your heart out on your sleeve Sir.
Now Alex is shakin’ her doggy behind up in Heaven with you.
And I’ll just bet your crackin’ up.
Man its hard to let go of you.
But were doin’ all right.
All right down here in the NYC – all right.
Douglas remember this – you are alive in me.”
Camille Bright-Smith – Alive In Me