Author’s Note: This column was written when I was going to have this book published by a different publishing company then the one that published this book. After almost omitting the column from the book, I decided to keep it in because my columns reflect how I feel at the time I write them – and when I wrote this column, it was how I felt.

Since the first day that I decided that I wanted to be a writer, my dream has always been to see my work published. As with any writer, be it songwriter, screenwriter – or journalist/author – seeing their work become commercially available represents the culmination of their hard work, their determination – and their skill.

When I wrote my first article in October of 1994 and made the decision to try and get it published, I had no idea what was ahead of me. For all I knew, no one would be interested in an article written by someone who never even had anything published before. But despite that – I pushed the article to those I presented it to as if I was a Pulitzer Prize Winning Journalist – when in fact – I was a wannabe writer with not one single published work. But while I didn’t have a resume of published works behind me, I did have something that would become the driving force behind my career – and the one single thing that brought me to where I am today – a belief in myself and in the words I had written.

From that first day when I chose my career path to today – the belief in myself and my writing is just as strong as it was then – and continues to bring me to new heights – including the most recent one that I never thought I would reach.

When I decided to choose a career as a writer, I had journalistic writing in mind – never even thinking of other means of writing. My feeling was that if I became a successful journalist and was able to make a living just by writing articles – then I had achieved the goal I set out for myself.

Thanks be to God – I did just that on October 13, 1994 – when “Big Town Hall Meeting Decries Lohmann’s Plan” became the first ever recorded work to be published with the by-line, “By Paul Wein”. When that day came and I held a newspaper in my hands with an article I wrote inside of it – it was a moment of my life that I will cherish forever – because that moment represented the fruits of my labor – and the beginning of my career as a journalist.

And again, thanks be to God, I get to experience that feeling all over again – because once again I will see my work get published for the first time – but this time – it will be as a book.

I have written this column for the past five years, including every aspect of my life in it. From happy times to sad times to my interests to my pet peeves, every aspect of my life has been included in the almost five hundred columns that I have written. So when September 11th came – it was only natural that the horrors I experienced, the feelings I had about the attacks and those who carried them out, the activities and duties that I performed at work during the cleanup and recovery – and the sadness that I felt about losing Doug all found it’s way into my column. In fact, since September 12th, I have written almost seventy columns having to do with the events of September 11th.

In addition to writing the columns about the 11th, I have also taken many pictures since that fateful day. Both during the attack and many of the days following the tragedy – I have used my camera to write a photogenic essay of the world’s most treacherous attack – and the United States’ biggest loss of life on it’s own soil.

One day, as I was printing out a column on my printer, I realized that I had pictures that I took that could go with the words I just wrote – and all of the other columns that I wrote since September 11th. I then realized that if I took the columns I wrote and the pictures I took and put them together – that I could compile it all into a book that I could design myself and give to those I know so they can have an account of my experiences through this life-altering tragedy.

From the moment I began working on my book – I knew that this was a good idea. Since that tragic Tuesday, so many of my family, co-workers, fans and friends have asked me about my experiences both on the 11th and in the days following the 11th. And I knew that when the book was done – I would be able tell them and all who were interested what I was going through without having to say a word – but rather by handing them a book of my thoughts through both words and pictures.

As the book was coming together, I showed it to a number of people who all said the same thing – that this book should be published so that everyone could have the opportunity to read it.

After the dozenth or so person told me that I should have this book published, I started to think that all of them were right – so I decided that perhaps I should bring this book to a publisher – and see if a stranger felt the same way as those who cared about me – and thought that my writing was publishable.

I went on-line and did a Google search for “Independent Publishers” – because bringing your book to a commercial publisher involves too much red tape, annoying requirements that must be followed or your manuscript is not even looked at – and a customer service mentality that mirrors John Q. Public trying to pitch a screenplay to the CEO of Paramount Pictures. So I did the search and found Dorrance Publishing, an eighty-year-old company based in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania that has published thousands of books in dozens of different mediums – from horror and science fiction to How-To books and autobiographies. In fact, Lucille Ball’s character in I Love Lucy took a book she wrote to the offices of Dorrance Publishing to see if they wanted to publish it – and so did I.

I called up Dorrance Publishing and did just what I did in 1994 when I called up The Brooklyn Skyline – I asked a complete stranger if they would like to publish my work even though I had no prior books published – because even eight years later – I still have a belief in myself and the words I have written.

When I called Dorrance Publishing and a woman answered, I told her that I was a survivor of the September 11th attacks who not only lost a friend – but also works for the Mayor’s Office of Emergency Management – and wrote a series of articles and took a number of pictures having to do with the terrorist attacks. I then told her that I was compiling them into a book to give to my friends and family – and how all of them said that I should get it published – and that I would like to know if Dorrance would be interested in seeing the book.

Hearing my story, she put me through to the voicemail of a Mr. Don Laird – whose answering machine heard the same story as the woman I previously spoke to. About ten minutes after I left the voicemail – Don Laird called me back and told me to send him the book. So I printed a color copy of what I had done so far, put it in a loose leaf – and for the first time in my life – sent a book I was working on to a publisher.

When I spoke to Mr. Laird on the phone, he told me that I should hear from him in approximately four weeks, which is the standard time that it takes to hear back from a publisher. So when I sent the book on December 18th, I was hoping for a letter from Mr. Laird by the end of January – which would make for a nice thirtieth birthday present. But instead – I got an unbelievable Christmas present – when I received a letter on Christmas Eve from Dorrance Publishing – telling me that, as the letter stated, that they would be “pleased” to publish my book. The letter went on to say that Dorrance would handle the design of the book, the distribution of the book – and the publicity surrounding the book. The letter then went on to say the following:

“In recent times, commercial publishers have been taking fewer and fewer risks. This trend has become more pronounced under present business conditions. These publishers, for example, tend to select manuscripts by established authors or well-known personalities even if not written as well as other manuscripts they reject…The manuscript you have submitted represents a significant personal accomplishment, and we would be very pleased to have the opportunity to work with you in bringing it into print."

As I read the words in the letter that was dated just three days after I mailed the book to Dorrance Publishing by two-day-air – I was both elated and shocked by the words I read. Just as I did on the day that I found out that my first article was going to be published – I felt a wave of excitement and jubilation flow through my body as I realized that many people would able to read the words that I wrote. And I was shocked because I realized again as I did then, that a company read the words that I wrote and felt that they were good enough to take a chance on – and make available to all who choose to read it.

At this point, I have not been able to contact Dorrance since I received the letter due to the Christmas/New Year’s break. And I realize that it will be a long road filled with a lot of work before I once again hold in my hand a copy of my published work.

But when that day comes – it will be worth everything.